How Do You Find the Time?

Let's see I need to have Sam to soccer practice at 4pm, Mary to gymnastics at 4:30, Ryan needs to see his personal basketball trainer at 4pm and then football practice at 5:30 and oh, yeah, it would be nice to have a home cooked meal!

This scenario is playing out all across the country as parents cram more and more into the lives our kids trying to make sure that they are able to take advantage of the opportunities that we did not have during our youth. It seems that the majority of us are guilty of this practice...and it's not just the sports minded people. You also have music lessons, dance recitals, scouting, book clubs, nature clubs, math clubs. Uggghhh! It is a never ending fill the void, there is nothing up my sleeve, follow the pea while I shuffle the cup, battling the clock while trying to make sure your child gets enough sleep.

We all want what is best for our kids but at what price?

To keep things in perspective, we should ask ourselves:
Are they having fun?
Do they seem happy?
How are their grades?
Do they have time to do their homework or are they cramming it in between activities or before they catch the bus?
Are you spending any quality time as a family?

The bottom line is 20 years down the road will your child thank you for these opportunities? Will your family be stronger? Or will you be asking yourself why you didn't spend more time just being family?

So You're Going to Play College Ball...

How many of you have your future planned out? If you were anything like me it probably sounds like this: After a stellar high school career, go on to play at a big time college, then represent your country in the Olympics before making a career playing professional basketball in front of thousands of adoring fans.

My dad always stressed the importance of grades so I also had planned in a couple of years at Oxford as a Rhodes Scholar just like Dollar Bill Bradley of Crystal City, MO. Bradley went on to play at Princeton and then played for the Knicks when he returned from England. He went on to be a Senator from New Jersey and even attempted a run at the presidency. Kids, go to Google and check out Bill Bradley - excellent role model!

There is a reason high schools and colleges refer to kids as "student-athletes." Very few people are blessed to play a sport in college - especially for an NCAA institution - let alone make it to the professional ranks. Below are some statistics to help you keep things in perspective. Don't let it stop you from dreaming - just make sure you don't forget about the school work.

• Only 3% of high school seniors playing basketball will play at an NCAA school
• Approximately 1% of NCAA senior players will get drafted by the NBA or WNBA
• 5.7% of high school senior boys will play in the NCAA
• Only 1.8% of NCAA Seniors will be drafted by the NFL

So what does it mean? Only 0.08% of high school seniors will eventually be drafted by the NFL and only 0.03% of high school seniors will eventually be drafted by the NBA.
Bottom line is that dreaming is a great thing to do and I strongly encourage for kids to set their goals high but don't forget to work on your grades - just in case you change your dream to making a difference versus playing a game!

Husker Chant

While I am in no way a Husker fan or supporter, the Head Coach of my son's 5th/6th grade football team is a Husker fanatic. Complete with the Tommy Frazier reference on his license plates. Kids, go google Tommy Frazier and Nebraska football and you will understand.

The coach introduced a pre-game ritual that he borrowed from his beloved Huskers. It is a powerful message to send to our nations future about development, fairness and sportsmanship. It doesn't ask for an advantage...just an opportunity. A chance to grow and develop to allow them to compete. It basically talks about the right way to win and if you lose, you still need to keep things in perspective and thank your opponent for competing and congratulate them on their victory.

Typically, the Coach would lead and the team would repeat the line. The first paragraph was spoken solemnly and with respect. The last paragraph is shouted with emotion enabling the young players to feed off it and as they gather in the huddle with the speech rising to the climax, the last sentence is emphasized with an exclamation point after each word. Then a simple breakdown of "Team Name on 3" and they would hit the field.

This year, a couple of our "seniors" (a.k.a. 6th graders) have taken upon themselves to lead this ritual at the end of practice, assuming the leadership role that had previously been performed by the head coach. Another sign of the development of not only young players, but young citizens that understand the power of leadership.

In the battles we go through life,
We ask for a chance that is fair.
A chance to lengthen our stride,
A chance to do or dare.
If we should win,
Let it be by the code,
With our heads and our honor held high.
If we should lose,
We will stand by the road
And cheer as the winners go by.

Day by Day!
We get better and better!
A team that can't be beat!
WON'T! BE! BEAT!

Practice vs Shooting Around

When you go outside with the basketball to improve your game are you practicing or shooting around? Do you realize that there is a difference? For the average player or for the recreational player, nope, not really a difference. For the great players...well, there is a huge difference!

To help clarify, let's define the two activities. Shooting around is just what the words mean: you go out to the court and you start shooting around. Typically, you don't have a plan of activities, an expected outcome or time limit. Your main purpose is just to put the ball into the basket and enjoy yourself in the process. Hey, this is a lot of fun and probably describes the majority of kids playing basketball today.

Now, when I say practice, I am talking about practicing as an individual like you practice with the team. There should be a "practice plan" just like most good coaches have in place before their practice. They have drills, times and goals for why each drill is being performed. You can do the same thing when you are practicing basketball alone. What type of drills will you work on today? Will you just shoot baskets or will you mix in ball handling and conditioning? How many shots will you take? Left-handed? Right-handed? Post moves? Free throws? 3 pointers?

Let's be honest, practices are typically not as fun as shooting around which is why, as kids, it is important to do both! One day, just shoot around for 30 minutes or an hour. Play a game in your mind where you hit the game winning shot against Kobe and the Lakers to win the NBA title 98 to 97. Enjoy playing the game and work on your moves. Play at game speed. Then the next day, go to work. Put the time in on the little things, the fundamentals, that will make you a better player. That will separate you from your competition. Set goals for shots made and then give yourself a reward or punishment (push-ups or sprints) when you don't meet those goals. Combine your drills to keep things from getting boring and allow you to work on multiple aspects at one time. Use the guard play drills which provide a series of ball handling moves towards a "defender" (a.k.a. trashcan) and then explode for a lay-up, power drive or jump shot. Do this from multiple spots on the court.

You have probably heard the saying that somebody somewhere is practicing basketball and when you meet and all things are even, that person will win. Will you be that person? I use a saying with my team, "Practice hard. Play hard." This is our break from the huddle and a mantra that I use to challenge my players to improve their game and to practice at game speed...not just shoot around. The courts are full of kids who shoot around and only shoot around. Great players practice. Will you be great?

Playing Your Child Up

When is it okay to play your child up a grade in sports? As parents we waiver between our desire to see our child be successful and our desire to protect. Is it better for them to struggle and play against better competition or for them to be successful against kids their own age? It is a tough question and made tougher when you, the parent, are also the coach.

Playing a child up a grade is a common occurrence in all sports today. Throw in the fact that it is common for boys with summer birthdays to start later when entering kindergarten, you see kids that are more mature for their grade and could play at a higher level. AAU and other heavily competitive organizations even organize their tournaments by age instead of grade to accommodate for these situations such as 12&U versus 6th grade. They go so far as to allow for a certain number of grade exceptions for those kids that have been held back.

I have had first hand experience with playing my child up with mixed success. In baseball, my child was physically able to play at the same level but was not ready mentally - especially when you consider he was a summer birthday that did not stay back a year - as he was typically 1 to 2 years younger then the other kids and if they played up a grade, he could be 3 years younger. In basketball, he was always a lower end player on the older team but gradually improved to earn more playing time but still towards the bottom.

Not until he played with a team made up of his own grade and against players in his grade, did he truly find success. At that point the light went off in his head. He realized that the game was slower and his work with the older kids allowed him to play at a different pace and with different skills than those in his age group. After that, he was able to translate success at that grade level to the older team as his confidence skyrocketed.

There is another instance where a younger basketball player played with an older team and was their point guard and a dominant player at the older level. As the kids moved on to school ball and played with only their grade, they found a huge gap in their team as they did not have a player ready to take over the point. That could have a huge impact on a high school program as gaps exist as the sophomores thru seniors enter the same playing arena.

So, when is it okay to play your child up? Well, it depends. It depends on the child, it depends on the child's team and it depends on what you hope to gain. Below I have listed a series of pro's and con's that hopefully you will consider when determining whether or not your child should play up a grade.

Pro's
- gain valuable experience against tougher competition
- start a year earlier in a program gaining more skills
- play with more experienced players
- less pressure to be "the guy"
- added confidence if you have success against older kids

Con's
- could be facing kids that are at least two years older
- not playing with age group
- unless really good, doesn't get the chance to be "the guy"
- typically, not viewed as a leader due to age
- is it the best for the program or the individual?
- could lead to dissension and resentment on the team
- coaches nightmare if playing time is not deserved or parents are not on board

Personally, it was not the right thing for him in baseball. It actually hampered his development. In basketball, I feel it helped my child's development initially, but he needed to have success and he was able to achieve that by playing against his age group. Now, I will have him play with his age group and from time-to-time, play him up a grade for special tournaments or will find higher level tournaments of his age group to challenge him in his continued development.